Long Time No See...

Well, it's been over 6 months since my last blog. I have had quite a few ups and downs in the diet train. I wish I could say I stuck to it more than not... Unfortunately I would have to say I have been off more than on. I still have been trying to keep with it, eating healthy, menu planning and not going out to eat. I have been trying to do the gym about 2-3 days a week, man oh man has that been difficult! Especially this winter!! I mean seriously? I can't think of anything I want to do less than get dressed, and go outside, when the actual temperature is -13!! 

The last few weeks though, I have been going to the gym after work, and doing a lot of crock pot cooking so I don't have to worry about having dinner ready at 5! I started a new job in August, 3 days a week I am the computer teacher at a local Catholic School. I think that has been a saving Grace... no pun intended. I am not home to snack all day. We have had 4 "Snow" Days since we got back from Christmas Break, and I can tell you, I definitely eat more when I am home... I think everyone does... right?

The nice thing about working, I know what I am having for breakfast, I know what I am having for lunch, and there is NO snacking between! Which... let me tell you.. very difficult when so many wonderful treats just appear like magic in the Teacher's Lounge. Since coming back from break, there have been cookies, donuts, chocolate, today there was Olive Garden!! WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO DO TO ME?!

I started MyFitnessPal on Sunday. Giving it a whirl. Can't hurt, right? I like what it's saying about my weight loss in the next 5 weeks. If I keep on track for the next 5 weeks I will be out of the 200 club! Hells yeah! I don't think I have been under 200 pounds since I was a sophomore in high school. You know, back when I thought I was massive. How stupid was I? 

I have a great support system at work and home. It's now less than 1 year until my wedding, and I think I really need to get back to writing my blog. I have been writing my novel so much, I am almost done with it now, and I can't wait to see where that takes me. 

Here is the honest truth about why I have not been writing my blog. I had nothing to say. I lost 2 pounds, gained 3, lost 4, gained 2, I have gained and lost so much weight in the last year, just when I think I am starting to look good, I get lazy and fall right back to where I was. It's a vicious cycle, and I am running out of time to get it gone. I should have been working this hard all along, but I didn't want to. I hate going to the gym, but I do it, and I work hard when I am there. There are a ton of people who tell me "You'll grow to miss it!" No. Never. I will never miss going to the gym, I've tried. It might be easier to miss if it didn't smell DISGUSTING every time I walked in! If I didn't have to hope and pray that I could get onto a machine because the last few weeks they have all been taken. If I didn't feel like I was being judged by the other gym goers every time I walked in the door, and if there wasn't this one annoying trainer who wants to chat while I'm working out. I just feel like if I wrote everyday, or even every week, I would bore the crap out of everyone! What I have to say about my life isn't that interesting. But I decided that whether people read this or not, I need to do this again, I need to be accountable. I am logging again, and I am blogging again. Whether I get views or not, I think it's important that I track my journey. I think it's important that I keep myself updated on the journey I have taken, and will be taking. 

I keep hearing this commercial, and it has a quote from Robin Williams, from The Dead Poet's Society. The last bit of it always gets me. "That you are here - that life exists, and identity; that the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse. That the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse. What will your verse be?"  

What will my verse be? Only time will tell...